Sponsors

If you don't have one, get one!!!

Peace and Comfort

I don't know how it works. Only that it never fails. Praying, meditating, talking to my sponsor, talking to my sponsees, reaching out, going to a meeting, reading the literature, these action items always provide stability, peace, comfort, and contentment in my life. As we venture into this holiday season and the world around us is chaotic, we can have the Peace that passes all understanding by holding on to these actions and not letting go. Why? I don't know. But if it can work for me it can work for anyone!

Peace and Grace

Pain

I have heard a lot in AA about walking through fire. My experiences over the last couple of weeks have made me see that I have been pulled through the fire, a good portion of that kicking and screaming. My Higher Power has used several tools to get me through a very painful situation.

I have learned one more time that dependence on money, people, and especially my own thinking, will leave me frustrated, worried, resentful, and defeated. I came to realize that this problem was to big for me to handle, that every attempt I made to fix it, made it worse. When I let go of it absolutely things got better.

The pain lasted exactly as long as I tried to control it. The only reason I didn't reach the point of insanity is because of strong sponsorship, being held accountable for taking the appropriate actions. Praying, meditating, working with others, talking to my sponsor...

Even though the problem still exists, it's affect on me is greatly diminished. My wife (who is an addict) and I forged an even closer bond in the midst of this. We now share our Guidance every day. I can now thank God for the problem, because once again it has made me see that I can't handle life without complete dependence on God.

In my experience misplaced dependencies and unrealistic expectations are a major part of my insanity. That is why I drank and used in the first place, to relieve the pain of my own insanity.

Purpose

The Big Book States on page 77. Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us. I always wanted and needed a purpose. A grounded, unshaken purpose. Now I have one. God given. Notice it doesn't say our purpose is to be of maximum service. To be fit for service. To fit ourselves. If I am trying to be of service then I am putting myself back in the equation. Wondering what to do, where to go. Trying to control events, situations and people. All I have to do is fit myself to be of maximum service. How?

Don't drink or use.

Work the steps with a sponsor and get connected to God.

Maintain and grow that connection through the actions; prayer, meditation, talking to other addicts and alcoholics, service, and fellowship.

Doing these things deflates my ego and makes it "FIT" so I can get out of the way, let God lead, and follow along Happy, Joyous and Free. It is such a better way to live.

What I believe

Who cares what I believe, it matters what I do!!! Action baby Action!!!

Happy, Joyous, and Free

God gave me the chance to do some step work with a new guy yesterday. I am so very grateful. The feeling I had as I left that place was again incredible. It was as if I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt for the past couple of hours I had been exactly where I was supposed to be doing exactly what I was supposed to do. Absolutely in God's Will for that moment in time. I can't describe how that felt. But I heard a guy say something I agree with. That is the feeling I searched for all of those years with drugs and alcohol. That Perfect contentment. Thank You God and Thank you AA.

Trudging

Just trudging the road of Happy Destiny today. One foot in front of the other, no great revelations... That is okay though. God has everything just as it should be...