Belief

I have heard it said in the past it doesn't matter what you believe when you get here, it matters what you do. There is one thing I had to believe when I got here and have to continue to believe. Its on page 25 of the Big Book. Until I believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as I have been living it, then I wont do this work.

Until I have run out of all other options, I won't, take suggestions and I won't do this work. The only reason I am recovered today is because I had a spiritual experience as the result of working the 12 steps. The only way I stay recovered is by continuing to work these steps and share this message with others.

The day I quit believing in the futility and hopelessness of life apart from God, who I see in everyone of you, I will quit taking the actions and I will drink, use and die.

I truly believe every relapse, comes when an alcoholic or addict begins to believe life can be lived apart from the program and God. I have heard it said well I started to think I could drink just a few and I tried it again. Not me, I started to think I could just take a break from the action things, from prayer, from meetings, from working with others, then after I disconnected I started to think perhaps I could drink a little.

For the past 23 months I have believed that I was hopeless without Divine Intervention, and the insane thought that I can do this on my own hasn't come. I have to take action everyday. Do I want to every day, nope. Do I believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as I was living it, absolutely.

That is all the rigorous honesty it took for my whole world to change, Giving up...